Posts Tagged: Movie Showtunes

What happens to Disney Princesses after They Get Married? Jon Cozart

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(This is another guest post by Ryan and is his own personal opinions. Not the opinions of

This is by far the funniest parody I have seen! Disney has a habit of sugar coating both current and historic events to make them more kid friendly. On the other hand, Jon Cozart is not afraid to provide us with the hard (and hilarious) truth of what happens to Disney characters that get involved with our oceans, the Middle East, indigenous population or interspecies relations. His explanations of what happens after Disney characters “dreams all come true” are definitely different than what I had envisioned growing up. However, if this guy ever happens to write or direct a sequel to any of these Disney movies, I will certainly come to the midnight premiere — I just won’t bring the kids.

Cozart opens up with a raunchy remix of Under the Sea. While he keeps the same bubbly Caribbean beat in an all accapella style, but he puts a darker spin on things. After all, Ariel is a 21st century mermaid. She has to share the sea with more than just her fishy friend Flounder — she also deals with the fallout from the Deepwater Horizon explosion and her pals being massacred and eaten by the Chinese and Japanese.

In the Aladdin bit, Jasmine has finally landed her dream boy; only to have him promptly imprisoned in Gitmo. This is when Cozart busts out my personal favorite line: Bush was crazy/Obama is lazy/ Al Qaeda’s not in this country! On top of the witty lyrics, I thought that the facial expressions that Jon Cozart constantly makes through this part added a whole new level of hilarity to the song — although I doubt that is any consolation to Aladdin — he probably just wishes he had saved a last wish with his genie so he could abolish the Indefinite Detention Act.

Denmark has some fairly liberal bestiality laws. Unfortunately, Beauty and the Beast is set in France, and Belle’s secret is out. While Jon Cozart showed the spite of the town’s people towards Belle very clearly, he leaves us with a cliff hanger as to whether she gets killed by a mob, placed in jail, or just has her hairy hubby taken away by PETA is all left up in the air.

The Pocahontas film had a fair bit of violence for a Disney movie, but compared to what happens afterwards, it was a walk in the park. This piece was the one that truly showcased Jon Cozart’s talent. It displayed not only his acapella skills and his brutal sense of humor, but his language and acting capabilities as well. The part where the French and Spaniards freak out upon learning just how depraved Pocahontas has become had me cracking up regardless of how many times I watched it.

I’m not generally into parodies, but Jon Cozart nailed this one. Disney can be sickeningly sweet far too often, and I thought that watching a video sinisterly tearing apart all their idealism was a breath of fresh air. Even those who aren’t so sadistic should still be able to appreciate the witty lyrics and the terrific acting and singing skills of Jon Cozart.

Somebody Super Like You & Life at Last – Phantom of Paradise

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I originally told Ryan to write a post about zombies on broadway…I had recommended a few shows about zombies and instead, we got this. Enjoy!

When I started watching the video for Somebody Super Like You / Life At Last from Phantom of the Paradise, I first though I was seeing a KISS tribute concert. After it became clear that was wrong, I wondered if had fallen asleep during a scene from the Rocky Horror Picture Show, but that did not seem right either. So I decided I would try to put the song in some context, and you know, read the video title. The song still begs a lot of questions, but at least now I know it is Somebody Super Like You / Life At Last from Phantom of the Paradise.

The whole scene from Phantom of the Paradise is way over the top and cheesy in a way I thought was awesome and hilarious. Opening with a huge thunderstorm and a blatant rip off of the Phantom of the Opera theme, the band quickly starts rocking out on stage. Watching how enthused their fans become, it’s hard not to start clapping and stomping right along with them.

The first time during Phantom of the Paradise when I was unable to hold my laughter in was when the girl in the yellow shirt was reaching out so desperately for the singer, and he takes her hand — literally. Watching as the band continues carrying out mutilations each verse somehow just gets funnier and funnier. I especially liked how they transferred from the victim’s scream back into the song. During the harmonizing part of the number, I thought that the graceful and dance-like sewing of the severed body parts was also hilariously choreographed.

Even though I thought the music in the second section of the song, where you get to see the newly created man, was a little lacking, it was my favorite part. Watching the phantom surreptitiously riding counterweights into the catwalk served for some very light hearted suspense, and I thought this more than made up for the lack luster music. To be honest, I was pretty excited to watch the Phantom use his bizarre lightening bolt gun to kill the Frankenstein character, as I really was not a fan of the man or the music. However, I did think that the guy calling for the fire extinguisher at the end was a great way to squeeze in a final laugh.

After watching Somebody Super Like You / Life At Last from Phantom of the Paradise, I am determined to see the rest of this movie over the weekend. Wrapping up a night out with a couple of friends and an absurd horror rock opera is not something I’ve done in the past, but after this clip from Phantom of the Paradise I am definitely looking forward to trying it out.

Spaceballs – Hello My Baby

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My friend ended up in the hospital the other day and they weren’t sure what was wrong with her. They ended up keeping her overnight. When I finally talked to her and she told me she had been in the hospital, she made a comment that the only other time in her life they made her sleep in a hospital was then she had a baby coming out of her. For some reason that instantly made me think of the movie Spaceballs and the alien that comes out of the guys stomach and sings Hello My Baby like the frog from the Looney Tunes.

Where babies come from may actually still be a mystery to many gay men. All we know is that women produce them and they can be adopted…but this movie made me finally realize why women complain about giving birth and why they say it is one of the most painful and magical things in the world. I’m thankful that I don’t have to have little alien babies pop out of my stomach, ouch, but it would be cool to see them start singing and dancing as they come out and take their first steps. Who knew that that is actually how babies are born and that it was that cool.

Anyways, I know where babies come from and the above is meant to be a joke so please don’t get upset or take it the wrong way. Giving birth is a seriously painful and amazing thing that shouldn’t be a joke, but when my friend was talking about it I instantly thought of the scene from Spaceballs where the alien comes out of the guys stomach and starts singing and dancing. If you have another favorite giving birth showtune or video clip, feel free to leave it below in the comments. I love the movie Spaceballs and think this is one of the funniest scenes from it. It also makes me happy that I don’t have to worry about giving birth, especially if its as painful as this movie makes it look. Thank you again for reading.

The Gremlins – New York New York – Donate to help from Sandy

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You’ve heard Frank sing New York New York and they always show Liza’s version if you are at a showtunes night, but one version stands out and kicks the others’ ass everytime. It’s the Gremlins singing New York New York from Gremlins Two. Not only are the Gremlins able to out perform any other cast, but who doesn’t love these movies. The other night I was watching one of them when on a date and when I was trying to think of what song would be appropriate to help motivate people to donate to help the people who were effected by Sandy, I instantly though of the second most destructive force in NYC that also sings about loving it. Even if you don’t like horror or comedy movies, or you weren’t even alive in the 80’s, you cannot help but to love Gizmo and the other Gremlins and you’ll laugh your ass off when the Gremlins sing New York New York.

When you finish watching the Gremlins singing New York New York, I encourage you to make a donation to a food bank, to donate blankets, food or whatever else you can to the people who live there. I have a couple of friends who have lost their house, everything they own and everything that they worked hard for. There are a ton of people without electricity and who still cannot live in their houses so I encourage you to donate to the different charities that are currently helping the people in NYC, Brooklyn, NJ and other places that were hit hardest by hurricane sandy. The Gremlins singing New York New York may be fun to watch, but remember that without NYC we wouldn’t have broadway, the Tony Awards in their original theatre and all of the other amazing things we love. Make sure that you donate at least 5 dollars to help a family or someone who lost their home at least get something to eat, have a warm blanket to sleep with or even an old toy to send to a kid who lost all of theirs. Just go to any of the major sites that are working on helping people in NYC or their own website and you’ll be able to find a way to help. If you know of a charity that takes 100% of the donations and gives it directly to people in NYC that are effected and not only part of your donation, leave a comment below and a link to that site so that people can donate to help the people in NYC.

Robin Hood Men in Tights – Men in Tights Song

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For some reason I thought of the Men in Tights song from the movie Robin Hood Men in Tights Movie. I remember watching this movie when I was a kid with my family and my Dad used to love it. It was always one of the movies that my family would love to watch together and we’d always laugh. I used to get most of the jokes, but I didn’t understand why they were funny.

In the scene where Robin is with Maid Marianne and they are walking through the woods, I never understood why everyone would laugh when they were singing to each other and all of the “Merry Men” were sitting in front of a screen like it was a movie. I got that Robin’s sword was like a penis and he was getting excited, but I didn’t actually understand the joke or the rest of the scene. Now that I’ve seen it as an adult I finally got all of the jokes. It’s kind of funny how parents and kids can watch a movie and everyone gets the jokes, but they actually mean two different things. Then when you watch the movie again when you’re an adult it all of the sudden makes sense and you can enjoy it even more. I’m still kind of surprised watching Robin Hood Men in Tights as an adult that my parents let me watch the movie, but at the same time it is an awesome movie and the Men in Tights song is actually still really funny.

One thing that I love about these movies is that there are always awesome showtunes in them. Men in Tights is one of them. It almost reminds me of something you would expect to see or hear in the show Spamalot. You have a ton of men making fun of the story line of Robin Hood and how they wore tights as well as creating a parody of other shows and things in the story as well. The movie is awesome and one that I love. The song Men in Tights from the movie version of Robin Hood Men in Tights is an awesome showtune that can easily get stuck in your head. Be careful watching it because you may end up singing it for the rest of the day. The movie is awesome and it is also a perfect showtune for you to play on your Halloween playlist.